Skip to main content


Mommy and Sydney, 1998

Today, me and the kid went on a college visit to Indiana State University. Its not our first choice but a choice nonetheless. I like spending time with the Kid. She's a fun chick when she's not acting "teenagery". Its my special word for acting nuts. I asked Syd if she had any questions prepared and she looked at me and said, "I got this." I'm like, oh boy! Me and Syd are different in that I'm a little more prepared for stuff but I'm far from being anal. She makes me nerves with her "I got this" stuff BUT she does always come through.

Mommy and Sydney, Cynthia and Dante in NYC 1991

On the ride to Terre Haute, we talked about Lil' Wayne and Jay-Z and who I felt were the top rappers in the game today. I was like, wow, this Kid thinks I'm still really up on this stuff. We talked about the crappy stuff like that "Get Silly" song. She told me that most don't consider that hip hop but just music for the club. I'm, didn't know that. We went back and forth about Lil' Wayne and Jay-Z. She knows I do have an appreciation for Lil' Wayne and I do LOVE Jigga. So, the conversation then turned to singers. We both stated radio just doesn't promote "real" singers. She mentioned how her friends dogged her love for Avant. SHE LOVES HIM. LOL. It was a fun convo.

Mommy with Sydney and Dante, Children's Museum 1993

"Radio", as her friends call her, started flipping the stations and found the Disney station. Immediately, she started singing something that could have been Ashley Simpson or some other non singing lame chick. The conversation moved to how she aced her debate in government. Sydney is GOOD at debate. She will argue you down over any little thing. Its annoying but has been a part of her personality since she could speak. I really think she should think about law but it doesn't interest her. She said she had to take the position as a republican pushing their platform on healthcare. She's good. It was cute to listen to her. This is when she sounds so much like me and mom. We are some opinionated folks.

Sydney at 4 years old~ Goofball

We get to Terre Haute but have to make a stop at Kmart. Syd needed to change her clothes. Going anywhere with her is an adventure. We are loud. We are goofy and we laugh alot. We have a special way of communicating. Sydney has gone through some tough stuff (hunger, death, near homelessness, strife, family dysfunction, father issues). She has taken it all like a champ. I really admire her. She does get on my nerves some days but she's suppose to do that at times.

I can remember her birth like it was yesterday. I can remember the day I found out I was pregnant with her. WOW. I cried so hard I was put in a room. LOL. I remember dreaming of the day she would graduate from high school and its approaching. Motherhood is tough and single motherhood is incredibly tough. I'm blessed for my village. My friends took on this mission of helping me raise Syd without question. She was OUR kid and Syd still thinks she's the queen bee even though some of my friends have their own children. Yeah, she can be bratty. I'm thankful for my friends and my family for being the village so many don't have.

Sydney - 10th grade
Sydney with Best Friend, Cheyenne~ The Ballers

Sydney always asks me if I would have another kid. If I never have another child, I'm fine but if I was with a man who wasn't a parent and really wanted a child, I would be VERY open to it. I'd never being a SINGLE parent again. NEVER. Too damn hard.

Parenthood is HARD especially if you really take every step seriously but the rewards are so great.

I love my kid. I love mommyhood.

Sydney and Robert, Prom 2008


Popular posts from this blog

Confessions of a Recovering Misogynist" by Kevin Powell

In the past few weeks, I've had the opportunity to have very brief conversations with Kevin Powell. Its very interesting to speak with someone with similar passions for community service. As someone who has been very transparent on her blog, I find this essay by Kevin refreshing. I just happen to see this on Facebook as someone posted it many months ago.
Thanks KP.


I take no great pride in saying this, I am merely stating a fact. It is not that I was born this way-rather, I was born into this male-dominated society, and consequently, from the very moment I began forming thoughts, they formed in a decidedly male-centered way. My "education" at home with my mother, at school, on my neighborhood playgrounds, and at church, all placed males in the middle of the universe. My digestion of the 1970s American popular culture in the form of television, film, ads, and music only added to my training, so that by as early as age nine or ten I saw females, includ…

The Ankh

Ankh : The Original Cross

The Ankh is defined as: The symbolic representation of both Physical and Eternal life. It is known as the original cross, which is a powerful symbol that was first created by Africans in Ancient Egypt.

The Ankh is commonly known to mean life in the language of Ancient Kemet (land of the Blacks) renamed Egypt by the Greeks. It is also a symbol for the power to give and sustain life, the Ankh is typically associated with material things such as water(which was believed by Egyptians to regenerate life), air, sun, as well as with the Gods, who are frequently pictured carrying an Ankh. The Egyptian king is often associated with the Ankh also, either in possession of an Ankh (providing life to his people) or being given an Ankh (or stream of Ankhs) by the Gods. This can be seen in the picture of King Senworsert below who is holding two Ankhs to his chest. There are numerous examples that have been found that were made from metal, clay and wood. It is usually worn as …

Ebony Covers: Black Cool

I love the concept of these covers.

Indeed, I celebrate my brothers. I love black men. I LOVE black men. I support you, admire you, and long for you. I wish ya'll loved us in the same manner. Other blog...yeah..I know.

Black Coolness in full effect.

Listed in no particular order.....