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Showing posts from August, 2009

6 days

No watching her do the chicken head, the stanky leg, or whatever dance Beyonce put in her video.

No more praying that the music blasting isn't coming from my apartment and PLEASE let there be no "bitches and hoes" mentioned.

No more getting phone calls from teachers saying, "Ms. Bayless, I really love your daughter and she's a joy to have in class but she issss a little too social and I can't get her to stop talking."

All I can say is, I did my best to raise a good person to give to the world. My goal wasn't to raise the next president, athlete, etc. I wanted my daughter to embrace life, to be confident, and to understand that she is here to give to others when she can.

You are wonderful kiddo. I continue to pray for your safety and that your heart will continue to be open to receive love and wisdom.

New Eyes

From February 19, 2004 at 5:50am until August 16, 2009 7:55am, I've had to embrace a new reality. The death of my mom changed it all and I've had to learn to see the world with new eyes. No longer was I seeing the world through family constructs or established roles. I was naked. I was reborn. God pushed me out and said "Go!"

The hardest thing to do is to look into the darkness and see your issues, your messes, your troubles. Its hard to face the demons that haunt you. With new eyes, the darkness can be seen as a blessing, your messes can be overcame. My eyes, these new fresh pair, have revealed so much about the inner workings of Rhonda L. Bayless. I've been able to address my bulimia, my control issues, my body image issues, and my need for vulnerability. I've accepted that I am strong and that God will have me to be his warrior and that I can be a voice, putting all ego aside because HE has the plan and I but a servant. My new eyes sees a beautifu…