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Showing posts from March, 2010

I love you....but I hate you....Indianapolis

It seems from the time I could make decisions about who I wanted to be, I've always been asked, "Are you from here?" From what others have said, Indy folks have a way about themselves that I must not possess. I find it odd.

Raised on the east side, I can admit to being "different". I was a little dark, held up in my room listening to music, writing poetry, and daydreaming. I thought there were others doing the same here in this place we call Naptown but I always found myself being ...different. So I wanted to leave Indy as soon as I could. My goal was to get to NYC with other daydreamers. A city of others, that's where I belonged. I didn't even get my driver's license until I was 21, unheard of here, all because I figured I wouldn't need it. Indy called me different so I wanted to go where the different people dwelled.

1991 - The Kid

At 22, I became a mother.

Nuff said. Didn't move. Now I have to live amongst the Hoosiers w…

Confessions of a Recovering Misogynist" by Kevin Powell

In the past few weeks, I've had the opportunity to have very brief conversations with Kevin Powell. Its very interesting to speak with someone with similar passions for community service. As someone who has been very transparent on her blog, I find this essay by Kevin refreshing. I just happen to see this on Facebook as someone posted it many months ago.
Thanks KP.


I AM A SEXIST MALE.

I take no great pride in saying this, I am merely stating a fact. It is not that I was born this way-rather, I was born into this male-dominated society, and consequently, from the very moment I began forming thoughts, they formed in a decidedly male-centered way. My "education" at home with my mother, at school, on my neighborhood playgrounds, and at church, all placed males in the middle of the universe. My digestion of the 1970s American popular culture in the form of television, film, ads, and music only added to my training, so that by as early as age nine or ten I saw females, includ…

him

I love him and don't even know him
I think of him and smile
and I've not seen his face
I can feel his prayers for me being answered as I'm becoming all he needs and desires and he doesn't know my name
He is loved and cherished as the sunrise and sunset and I long for his touch

But one day, that moment will arrive when we glance upon something we've always known was out there


love.

Truth (repost)

Truth
Fearing the possibility that I could be
the manifestation of
truth
Spiritually you called down from the heavens
Asked the ancestors
Prayed unto the Divine
allow reality to be near me
to be my reflection
as clear as the Nile
Let me be the one to touch
Truth

In your Power
I stand before you
you tremble
afraid to let go of the past
hurt
anger
death
what do you choose
how can you be
at peace in a lost of love
Truth has decided
to hold your hand
caress your face
kiss your lips
The dream is more than fantasy
Truth is not going away

So what will I do
what will I say
all that I want has been given
the table has been set
my cup runneth over
and I
turn away.


Truth.
I close my eyes and dream think and feel so lost
wondering when will be the next time
my hips get to sway
to
and
fro
as we allow miles to give us
a moment of madness to remember

when will I get to feel your eyes write
words of love on my soul

can I have this time again.....
to love
again

The Promise

Genesis 15AFTER THESE things, the word of the Lord came to [Rhonda] in a vision, saying, Fear not, [Rhonda], I am your Shield, your abundant compensation, and your reward shall be exceedingly great.

God's Way.....

There was a in time of the Valley, a time when I lost my mom, my job, some friends and almost my sanity, I couldn't understand God. So much occurred in a two year period that I was confused and sadden. I didn't know what He/She was doing.

But I then understood and learned my lesson quickly....

I now don't shake at any signs of trouble. I understand that patience is the way to all things through God and to God.

Patience.

There is something that is occurring that if this thing really happens, wow...I'll say this much. If I every doubted the presence of a god, of a creator, then one thing would provide it beyond measure.

I'm not saying I need God to prove himself. I believe but WOW.

God's way is not so much mysterious as it really is about patience and belief in having your desires fulfill beyond measure.

Patience is the key to seeing if this one thing will manifest....

I wait......

My Dearest Knight....

I haven't blogged in awhile mainly due to time but I read something that made my heart flutter, my mind race, and made me want to step up my writing...



As You Leave Me.... Shiny record albums scattered over
the living room floor, reflecting light
from the lamp, sharp reflections that hurt
my eyes as I watch you, squatting among the platters,
the beer foam making mustaches on your lips.

And, too,
the shadows on your cheeks from your long lashes
fascinate me--almost as much as the dimples
in your cheeks, your arms and your legs.

You
hum along with Mathis--how you love Mathis!
with his burnished hair and quicksilver voice that dances
among the stars and whirls through canyons
like windblown snow, sometimes I think that Mathis
could take you from me if you could be complete
without me. I glance at my watch. It is now time.

You rise,
silently, and to the bedroom and the paint;
on the lips red, on the eyes black,
and I lean in the doorway and smoke, and see you
grow old before my eyes, and smoke, why do you
c…