Saturday, June 28, 2008
I'm so affected by my friends and just my surroundings. Its the introvert in me. I listen. I analyze and over analyze too. The running theme this week was dissatisfaction with various aspects of life, from jobs, to friendships, relationships, politics, etc. I think I've talked with someone about each these things this week; most of the time just listening.
Why do we get dissatisfied? To me, its no more than a push to move and do something. Piss or get off the pot. Do something. Move. Make a decision. But so many, including myself at times, do nothing. Nothing makes it worse, really. What REALLY happens is that we become fearful? We know we are dissatisfied but trying to make a decision to move to action is just overwhelming, scary so we just stay in dissatisfaction.
So many are dissatisfied with our schools but do nothing. Some are dissatisfied with their jobs (mirror, mirror on the wall) and do nothing (doin' something though). I've dealt with dissatisfaction in a relationship and did nothing (stayed thinking it would get better...nope) when I knew my spirit wanted me to walk out the door. We make the DECISION, the choice to stay in dissatisfaction sometimes. I do believe that feeling, discomfort is no more than a prompt to do something, say something; respond.
I know I've learned to move and respond and I've tried my best to teach the Kid not to stay in dissatisfaction too long but use it as motivation to make positive changes in herself and in her community. The worse thing we can do is STAY in dissatisfaction and then try to drag others into our funk. I remember talking with a friend about her boyfriend being dissatisfied with his life and making her life miserable all because of his fear to make a move. That's unfair. Its unfair to stay on a job you hate, its unfair complain about your community and do nothing and its unfair to stay in a relationship you're unfulfilled with. Its unfair to my kid when I don't move on my dreams and goals because it directly effects her life. Piss or get off the pot. Yanno.
Dissatisfaction can lead to depression, bitterness and anger. I know that I'm still abhorring some anger with my ex when I made the decision to stay in my dissatisfaction. That's actually unfair to him. I still have to take responsibility for myself and my own happiness but I realize that sometimes we have to be shoved HARD to move to decision making or we make the decision that seems the easiest. Being shoved sucks though. Its normally God saying ok, I've let you try this your way, now its My turn. God's way sometimes ain't too fun. Or when we don't really heed to the decisions we need to make and choose the otha path like when Sarah had Moses go to lay with Hagar. It seemed like the easier path. Nah....
Another friend had me so preplexed. From the first meeting, he had some "discomfort" in a relationship. I would listen. I could tell he really was into this chick but damn. She wasn't that into him or something was up. He had a checklist: smart, check; well read; check; traveler, check; earthy vibe, check. She was fitting his list of must haves but kept finding himself dissatisfied. I'm still thinkin'....uh...well, checklist don't work but I would just listen. He didn't heed to that little thing in his stomach saying this isn't it. Yeah, there were times when they had a good time. He would tell how they are workin' it out. I'm like....hmmm...ok. The next week....dissatisfaction would creep back up. He was soooooooooo smitten with her that he ignored his need for more. I told him one day, "GO FOR IT!". He was confused but I figured if he gave it 100% that he would have NO regrets when this thing fell on its face. He went for it and it fell apart. You hate to be right but you could hear his troubles from the beginning. He was rarely satisfied even though she fit his vision of perfection.
I hate to see my friends and loved ones be troubled by this. When we start harming ourselves (depression, bitterness) and others (drawing people into the drama), its ungodly. Its damaging.
Watch and Pray.
Dissatisfaction can be VERY good for the spirit...its that motivtation to MOVE!!
Its simple. Dissatisfaction is that urge....Take the piss.