Saturday, May 29, 2010

Dimes, Nickels, and Quarters

Watched a clip today of man criticizing Chilli from TLC and her reality show. Admittedly, I've never watched the show. We are cable-less and will remain that way but I'm familiar with the concept. She's looking for a man.  In the clip, the commentary first criticized Chilli's check list, the list of things she's needing and wanting in a man.  "Handsome, rich, and big........"  I'd agree with the clip, this is a little immature from a 39 year old woman but its a reality show. Why expect more......

The clip continues with the man telling his viewers that women need to know if they are hot or not.  We need to know and stay at our station. He let us know that men will down grade for sex so we shouldn't feel too good about ourselves (those who are not Dimes) because, as he mentioned in the clip, "look at Flava Flavs mother, someone had to get with that to get Flav".  Completely disrespectful.  But once again, we are to reminded: Not all of us are Dimes. 


Dimes. 


He then let us know those who are no more than a SIX (on this Dime scale) should KNOW they are a SIX.  He provides a list of criteria so you will know if you're a "Hot Chick" or a "Dime". 


  1. Men buy you things and things for you without you asking.
  2. You date rich and famous men.
  3. You have haters.  Real Haters.  The Sixes tend to have imaginary haters. 
There's more but I've tried to forget this level of ignorance.

So why did I watch this clip?  The person who posted claimed this was "Real Talk".   Ok. Maybe I'm just not a part of the cool kids OR I don't know what "Real Talk" really is about.  These were women cheering this point of view along.  [deep dramatic sigh]  This was "Real Talk".  This was TRUTH.   Women should know their place.  I guess.

Its so unfortunate that with the state of black relationships, black men and women view each other in this way.  Its sad that women buy into this playground of misgivings and sexist commentary.  We cheer this on as to gain some credibility with the author of the clip, men viewing the clip, or anyone who also agrees.  What do we gain from agreeing to sexist remarks?  How do we better our relationships if we don't have respect for one another?   When will we see that this is oppressive commentary?  How do we gain a assertive voice against sexism when so many can't identify oppressive speech?


I am not a Dime.  I am not a MILF.   I am not a Cougar.  I am not to be rated and scored.


I believe so many are afraid to stand alone in fear of being criticized of championing the cause of feminism or being some extreme voice for women.  We can't be afraid.  We are powerful beyond measure.  Let your voices rise.  We can't allow there be some justification of abuse of ANY woman.  As soon as that crack in the wall occurs, the levees break.  


No Dimes. No Nickels. No Sixes or Fives......We are women.  Love us. 

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