Skip to main content

Dimes, Nickels, and Quarters

Watched a clip today of man criticizing Chilli from TLC and her reality show. Admittedly, I've never watched the show. We are cable-less and will remain that way but I'm familiar with the concept. She's looking for a man.  In the clip, the commentary first criticized Chilli's check list, the list of things she's needing and wanting in a man.  "Handsome, rich, and big........"  I'd agree with the clip, this is a little immature from a 39 year old woman but its a reality show. Why expect more......

The clip continues with the man telling his viewers that women need to know if they are hot or not.  We need to know and stay at our station. He let us know that men will down grade for sex so we shouldn't feel too good about ourselves (those who are not Dimes) because, as he mentioned in the clip, "look at Flava Flavs mother, someone had to get with that to get Flav".  Completely disrespectful.  But once again, we are to reminded: Not all of us are Dimes. 


Dimes. 


He then let us know those who are no more than a SIX (on this Dime scale) should KNOW they are a SIX.  He provides a list of criteria so you will know if you're a "Hot Chick" or a "Dime". 


  1. Men buy you things and things for you without you asking.
  2. You date rich and famous men.
  3. You have haters.  Real Haters.  The Sixes tend to have imaginary haters. 
There's more but I've tried to forget this level of ignorance.

So why did I watch this clip?  The person who posted claimed this was "Real Talk".   Ok. Maybe I'm just not a part of the cool kids OR I don't know what "Real Talk" really is about.  These were women cheering this point of view along.  [deep dramatic sigh]  This was "Real Talk".  This was TRUTH.   Women should know their place.  I guess.

Its so unfortunate that with the state of black relationships, black men and women view each other in this way.  Its sad that women buy into this playground of misgivings and sexist commentary.  We cheer this on as to gain some credibility with the author of the clip, men viewing the clip, or anyone who also agrees.  What do we gain from agreeing to sexist remarks?  How do we better our relationships if we don't have respect for one another?   When will we see that this is oppressive commentary?  How do we gain a assertive voice against sexism when so many can't identify oppressive speech?


I am not a Dime.  I am not a MILF.   I am not a Cougar.  I am not to be rated and scored.


I believe so many are afraid to stand alone in fear of being criticized of championing the cause of feminism or being some extreme voice for women.  We can't be afraid.  We are powerful beyond measure.  Let your voices rise.  We can't allow there be some justification of abuse of ANY woman.  As soon as that crack in the wall occurs, the levees break.  


No Dimes. No Nickels. No Sixes or Fives......We are women.  Love us. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Confessions of a Recovering Misogynist" by Kevin Powell

In the past few weeks, I've had the opportunity to have very brief conversations with Kevin Powell. Its very interesting to speak with someone with similar passions for community service. As someone who has been very transparent on her blog, I find this essay by Kevin refreshing. I just happen to see this on Facebook as someone posted it many months ago.
Thanks KP.


I AM A SEXIST MALE.

I take no great pride in saying this, I am merely stating a fact. It is not that I was born this way-rather, I was born into this male-dominated society, and consequently, from the very moment I began forming thoughts, they formed in a decidedly male-centered way. My "education" at home with my mother, at school, on my neighborhood playgrounds, and at church, all placed males in the middle of the universe. My digestion of the 1970s American popular culture in the form of television, film, ads, and music only added to my training, so that by as early as age nine or ten I saw females, includ…

The Ankh

Ankh : The Original Cross



The Ankh is defined as: The symbolic representation of both Physical and Eternal life. It is known as the original cross, which is a powerful symbol that was first created by Africans in Ancient Egypt.


The Ankh is commonly known to mean life in the language of Ancient Kemet (land of the Blacks) renamed Egypt by the Greeks. It is also a symbol for the power to give and sustain life, the Ankh is typically associated with material things such as water(which was believed by Egyptians to regenerate life), air, sun, as well as with the Gods, who are frequently pictured carrying an Ankh. The Egyptian king is often associated with the Ankh also, either in possession of an Ankh (providing life to his people) or being given an Ankh (or stream of Ankhs) by the Gods. This can be seen in the picture of King Senworsert below who is holding two Ankhs to his chest. There are numerous examples that have been found that were made from metal, clay and wood. It is usually worn as …

sexob

I will never, ever, never, ever live in a box.


again.


If I can't be appreciated, celebrated, loved, and befriended with honestly and openly....with no conditions and controls.....then I can't be....for you.

I'm a good friend.  I'm a good person. I deserve good things from good people who really want to celebrate whatever connection I have with them....outside the box.


I'm free to be.