Skip to main content

Be real with me, Be real with you...

The things we do to be in a relationship and even to stay there can be really....saaaaddddd.

I remember trying to be EVERYTHING for my ex-boyfriend. It came naturally but I also compromised a peace of me as well.

Being single for sooooooooooooooooo long, (gigglin'), I've sat and watched the dynamics of various relationships around me. I can see where I made similar mistakes out of insecurity. You take leaps that you wouldn't ordinarily do. You start liking stuff because he/she likes them. You want to be the spark in their eyes. Been there and never going back. I'm all for making my partner happy but Rhon is about the real deal. I can't jump, leap or hop that high anymore and I wouldn't want a man who would expect it.

Be true to you.

This is what I've seen over and over. In the beginning of the relationship, everyone has their list.

I want him to be smart.

I want him to be ambitious.

I want him to be cultured

blah, blah, blah....

So, the potential partner hears this. They want you. They like you ALOT. They aren't as cultured. They really just like being the clerk (not the manager), the janitor (not the supervisor), the nursing assistant (not the nurse). That's all good though. DO YOU! They are smart BUT finds no use for it. They are cool though. When you look at them, you can see potential. There's something that keeps you there, right. Not all bad.

But the potential partner is a little insecure. They remember the list. They don't think you could like them FULLY because of who they are so they fake it. They fake until they make it. They try to fit into the list. Its not authenically who they are but they like you. They suddenly become sorta ambitious. They get into the stuff you're into. You think...ah...well this is awesome. Perfection. There's some disagreements....normal. Coolness.

How long can they stay in character? Man, I've seen folks do it for years. YEARS. They play it.

Sad huh?

Ya'll don't do that. Just rock you. In all of my mess, I'm down for Rhon. I'm not agreeable. (giggle) I'm stubborn. I'm me. I'm all Aquarian. At the same time, I'm a "ride or die" chick. I will have your back 100%. There are things I do believe you team up with partner . My ex was a business man and there were plenty of business ventures that I assisted him with. I'm not talking bout that sorta thing. You should jump on board but you should do it because you believe in the partnership. You shouldn't try to impress so that you think he/she will stay.

Rock you. Love you. Be you.

As much as I beef about my weight, I love me. I'm awesome. You're awesome.

Relationships shouldn't be built on some falsehood.

LOVE YOU.

:)

i'm chipper today!

Real Thang.....I've been lovin' this song because...its all about being real.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Confessions of a Recovering Misogynist" by Kevin Powell

In the past few weeks, I've had the opportunity to have very brief conversations with Kevin Powell. Its very interesting to speak with someone with similar passions for community service. As someone who has been very transparent on her blog, I find this essay by Kevin refreshing. I just happen to see this on Facebook as someone posted it many months ago. Thanks KP. I AM A SEXIST MALE. I take no great pride in saying this, I am merely stating a fact. It is not that I was born this way-rather, I was born into this male-dominated society, and consequently, from the very moment I began forming thoughts, they formed in a decidedly male-centered way. My "education" at home with my mother, at school, on my neighborhood playgrounds, and at church, all placed males in the middle of the universe. My digestion of the 1970s American popular culture in the form of television, film, ads, and music only added to my training, so that by as early as age nine or ten I saw females, includ...

For Colored Girls: Seeing Red

After being very vocal about being Tyler Perry a less than favorite choice to direct an adaption of Ntozake Shange's "For Colored Girls who have considered suicide when the rainbow is enuf" or better known now as "For Colored Girls", I watched the movie feeling empty. I've seen myself in the colors of orange and green . I've empathized with the browns in my life. I know yellow and I know blue. Then there is RED . I could spend time examining the issues I had with the movie. I could also celebrate the power of dynamic words used to express OUR stories of various hues, depths, and struggles. The color red, Janet Jackson's character, disturbed me. This development of this character reeks of Perry's own personal agenda. He wanted to talk about the down low situation. He wanted to bring in HIV and so he did.  In spite of Janet's less than wonderful acting abilities, I was interested in how her story would play itself out. I heard about her. Th...