Skip to main content

Finally getting some rest.....and then....




Some of you many know, I'm learning how to REST again, mind, body, and spirit literally. Last night, I lay down and I actually sleep. I didn't wake up a bunch of times. I was peaceful. I could have been the rain. I LOVE the rain. Its so calming to me. I actually get happy when I know its going to rain. Weird but true.

I'm sleeping but then my mind starts in. I can feel myself thinking about stuff I need to do. UGHHHHHHHHH

I fight it.

I then start thinking about certain people in my cipher and wondering...WHY ARE YOU THERE? but....

I fight it.

Then I feel like something or someone is playing with my feet. I know that sounds weird BUT I am someone that believes spirits do that stuff. I get pissed off and still slightly asleep, I yell, "Leave my feet alone and go away." I try to go back to sleep and I do but now I'm pissy.

When I finally get up, I wake up in a mood. Not necessarily bad but definitely moody. I'm thinking about things, people and stuff I need to rid myself of, I'm looking at Zeus (the dog) as if he did something. He just walked in his crate and sits down like, "That chick is buggin'". I think I woke up a little paranoid. I'm really questioning folks motives. Why are you in my world? What do you REALLY want from me? Are you true? Why do I want YOU in my world?

(sigh)

This is all just moving me towards starting yoga, FINALLY. I need to connect my mind, body and spirit cuz they are all working on their own right now. I know that REST and SLEEP are vital to being healthy and I'm so unhealthy right now because I can't seem to get either one.

I'll try again tonight.

(sigh)

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Confessions of a Recovering Misogynist" by Kevin Powell

In the past few weeks, I've had the opportunity to have very brief conversations with Kevin Powell. Its very interesting to speak with someone with similar passions for community service. As someone who has been very transparent on her blog, I find this essay by Kevin refreshing. I just happen to see this on Facebook as someone posted it many months ago. Thanks KP. I AM A SEXIST MALE. I take no great pride in saying this, I am merely stating a fact. It is not that I was born this way-rather, I was born into this male-dominated society, and consequently, from the very moment I began forming thoughts, they formed in a decidedly male-centered way. My "education" at home with my mother, at school, on my neighborhood playgrounds, and at church, all placed males in the middle of the universe. My digestion of the 1970s American popular culture in the form of television, film, ads, and music only added to my training, so that by as early as age nine or ten I saw females, includ...
Post a Comment
Read more

For Colored Girls: Seeing Red

After being very vocal about being Tyler Perry a less than favorite choice to direct an adaption of Ntozake Shange's "For Colored Girls who have considered suicide when the rainbow is enuf" or better known now as "For Colored Girls", I watched the movie feeling empty. I've seen myself in the colors of orange and green . I've empathized with the browns in my life. I know yellow and I know blue. Then there is RED . I could spend time examining the issues I had with the movie. I could also celebrate the power of dynamic words used to express OUR stories of various hues, depths, and struggles. The color red, Janet Jackson's character, disturbed me. This development of this character reeks of Perry's own personal agenda. He wanted to talk about the down low situation. He wanted to bring in HIV and so he did.  In spite of Janet's less than wonderful acting abilities, I was interested in how her story would play itself out. I heard about her. Th...
Post a Comment
Read more