Thursday, January 21, 2010

love obsession

my mom was obsessed with love. She loved everything and everyone but most of all she loved my father. She wanted to "be in love". She wanted to talk, hold hands, share....and love. Unfortunately, she didn't marry a man that would do any of least not while they were married.

She desired LOVE.

I'm my mother's child. I'm obsessed the need for it....and I have no idea why. For years I've put it aside and focused on work and the Kid. Something has come over me in the past year. I've looked around and realized, I NEED someone. I need to talk. I need to vent. I need someone to CARE FOR ME.

I love all of the folks that say....."just wait"....blah blah blah. I'm not joining eharmony anytime soon but I'm so ready. UGHHHHHHHHH....I hate saying it.

I hate this disparate plea. I HATE it. I have to be real with me.

I've never been so insecure either. I have some real reflection to do.

skin hunger. Love.

la la la la la......

1 comment:

Onye said...

You know, I have to admire you for admitting this 'out loud'.
Black women are the shoulders of Atlas, the caregivers and caretakers of their vast and complicated world.
But when one of us says, out loud, 'I want to be loved' (not I want a man/plaything/sugar-daddy/fling), that is not only brave, but a game-changer in the chess court of life.
It says, 'I'm not afraid to admit that my soul needs to connect to another kindred soul and share raw emotion.'
Caveat emptor (buyer beware) to the one that receives your raw, honest love. They will be forever changed.
The bar has been raised, the standard has been lifted.
Who will step up to the challenge to love us--we that are strong, fearless, passionate, interdependent (yes you read that right), fabulous--and let themselves be loved?