Sunday, July 11, 2010


One mo time....

If you dig through my Myspace blogs (gotta be my friend to dig), you will find a lot of blogs on Sisterhood, women getting along. I've worked with women and girls all of my life.  I come from a family filled with strong women.  I understand the importance of female relationships.  Its very important for women to connect with other women.

So why do we still have this breakdown in sisterhood? Why do we still have women saying, "I really don't get along with other females"?  Why do we roll our eyes at each other? Why are we afraid to show love?

I'm not about to write an essay because there are so many reasons why we are were we are today. Sexism being one of the top reasons but lets move toward some solutions with first like simply -  looking in the mirror. Healing starts at home.  When you see another beautiful woman, do you immediately pass judgment or can you appreciate her beauty AND tell her she's beautiful? When you see a man you're attracted to, do you size up his girlfriend to see if you're more attractive?  Do you believe that women are NATURALLY backbiting, vindictive, and so-called "catty"?   Why do you feel this way?  Examine. Could you be the type of female you dislike?

I always think its funny when I hear women say, "I don't have female friends" and yet when you ask them about a couple of close sister friends, those sister friends somehow don't count as "women".  Reminds of Do the Right Thing....remember this.....

Prince isn't 'black' and somehow close sisterfriends aren't "women".....[scratches head]

So what's so good about Female Friendships? 

Consider this from:

  • Longevity – Married men live longer than single men, yet women who marry have the same life expectancy as those who don't. However, women with strong female social ties (girlfriends) live longer than those without them. 
  • Stress – For decades, stress tests focused solely on male participants, believing that all humans would respond in the same manner. When these same stress tests were finally conducted on females it was discovered that women don't have the same, classic 'fight or flight' response to stress that men do. According to the research presented in The Tending Instinct, women under stress have the need to 'tend and befriend.' We want to tend to our young and be with our friends. Time with our friends actually reduces our stress levels. 
  • More Stress - A study conducted by the UCLA School of Medicine found that when we're with our girlfriends, our bodies emit the "feel good" hormone oxytocin, helping us reduce everyday stress. By prioritizing our female friendships and spending time with these friends, we take advantage of a very simple, natural way to reduce our stress. 
  • Even more stress - Prairie voles, a monogamous rodent, have a similar response to stress. When a male vole is put in a stressful situation, he runs to his female partner. Female voles, when stressed, immediately run to the females they were raised with. 
  • Self-esteem - A recent study by Dove indicated that 70% of women feel prettier because of their relationships with female friends. It's no surprise that our self-esteem is highly influenced by our girlfriends; this is important to understand for girls as well as women. 
  • The Health Factor – Women without strong social ties risk health issues equivalent to being overweight or a smoker - it's that serious.

I love my female friends just as much as I love my male friendships.   I have both and I cherish both. Its good for my soul and I find no reason not to love and admire women.  How about you?

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