As I actively move into this next phase of my life, the players have changed. The people I talk with daily have changed. I still have my BEST friends, my sisters who will never leave my side but we all still just check in.
There's a new crew of folks around me, some willing and some I think are struggling (another blog). Its been cool. I feel like some of this is where I should have been 12 years ago before the ex. I'm very happy to be able to do my thing. I'm still not there. I still push people. I'm still a tad over bearing but whatever. My drive is actually the way that I stay humble. When I think everything needs to be fixed, I don't have time to think I'm the sh*t. I don't know if that's logical thinking but it works for me. I'm ok with it for now.
I'm moving towards something I really can't see yet. All I know is, I have to continue to building the character of my daughter, get my finances back on track from the Valley years, establish a strong foundation for CWUW, and bottomline, take care of Rhonda.
I truly have learned that I need to focus on me wholeheartedly. I want to be WHOLE. I desire to be a woman that God is proud to call his child. I'm working. I refuse to function in guilty for anything. Just because I know something is wrong, there is no need to feel guilty about it. Learn and move on. Guilt can make you do some weird stuff to make up for it. It makes you over compensate when there is no need. nah....learn and move on.
Another interesting thing is being with single women.....has been a learning experience. I know I get asked constantly about my singlehood and I really can't answer why I'm single. I don't get approached. (shrug) But I think some women are single because....well....YIKES. I'll leave it there. I am going to start trying get out there and date...I think I'm a fly ass chick....and need a fly ass dude to partner with me in this journey. I driven dude with purpose. When you see a guy like that, have him all me. :)
I'm rambling. I'm in a good place even though there are somethings out of wack. I'm good with me.
CWUW is really moving ahead. I'm really happy about it. 2010 will be GREAT!
yes sir.
There's a new crew of folks around me, some willing and some I think are struggling (another blog). Its been cool. I feel like some of this is where I should have been 12 years ago before the ex. I'm very happy to be able to do my thing. I'm still not there. I still push people. I'm still a tad over bearing but whatever. My drive is actually the way that I stay humble. When I think everything needs to be fixed, I don't have time to think I'm the sh*t. I don't know if that's logical thinking but it works for me. I'm ok with it for now.
I'm moving towards something I really can't see yet. All I know is, I have to continue to building the character of my daughter, get my finances back on track from the Valley years, establish a strong foundation for CWUW, and bottomline, take care of Rhonda.
I truly have learned that I need to focus on me wholeheartedly. I want to be WHOLE. I desire to be a woman that God is proud to call his child. I'm working. I refuse to function in guilty for anything. Just because I know something is wrong, there is no need to feel guilty about it. Learn and move on. Guilt can make you do some weird stuff to make up for it. It makes you over compensate when there is no need. nah....learn and move on.
Another interesting thing is being with single women.....has been a learning experience. I know I get asked constantly about my singlehood and I really can't answer why I'm single. I don't get approached. (shrug) But I think some women are single because....well....YIKES. I'll leave it there. I am going to start trying get out there and date...I think I'm a fly ass chick....and need a fly ass dude to partner with me in this journey. I driven dude with purpose. When you see a guy like that, have him all me. :)
I'm rambling. I'm in a good place even though there are somethings out of wack. I'm good with me.
CWUW is really moving ahead. I'm really happy about it. 2010 will be GREAT!
yes sir.
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