ClevaWords

I know everyone is doing there " so long " to 2010 blog. Here is mine. What did 2010 bring me? What does reflection reveal? How should I move into 2011 with the knowledge of what I've learned? I'm actually not really wanting to look back but not because of anything negative. This has been a balanced year, ups and downs, something better known as Life .  I want to do better at looking ahead. I want to embrace possibilities and dreams and visions and be wrapped in the hope that comes. 2011 will bring more living and I want to have a better attitude about how to live better. I have an interesting task ahead.  For me, its not about how to handle hardships. Its about handling the good times and creating a space for beauty to be birthed and grow around me. I don't need to take on the world and prove I'm strong. I am . Its that simple. I'm assured of the visions for my future PROFESSIONALLY. What about Rhonda? 2010, I did nothing to create FUN for ...

Its Christmas.  I've seen all the usual suspects - The Christmas slogans. "Jesus is the reason for the season", Merry CHRISTmas, blah, blah, blah.  I understand the celebration of the birth of Christ and why people want to keep that on the forefront of every ones mind but it also seems to go against the purpose and meaning of the birth, life, death, and resurrection of Jesus.  He would have never wanted a day in celebration of Himself but of others and for it to happen daily. Let's every day celebrate each other and the love of this Christian Deity, this great man, this great LOVE. Our world is becoming more and more evil and yet more and more religious. Its confusing. I pray that on May 5th, we offer love the same way.  On July 23rd, we feed the hungry.  On September, 18th we celebrate the Love of the Christ.  Celebrate but celebrate tomorrow and next month, and next year. This Spirit should never go away.

  What is this ad about? Kim Kardashian? Death? Designer dresses? Coffin Sale? This ad is suppose to make you think and care about HIV/AIDS . You are suppose to care that you will not be able to tweet or have facebook contact with your favorite celebrity. #FAIL HIV/AIDS is too important put more emphasis on a celebrity than the issue itself. To use DEATH in this manner is misguided. World AIDS Day is December 1, 2010 Visit http://www.aids.gov for an event and testing site near you.

I AM this SONG This woman is growing weary Of having to be so strong Of having to pretend I’m made of stone So I won’t end up with no broken bones I can’t fight every battle alone I want someone to lift me Heal my wounds and give me kisses on my head Say words that should be said Fear is not the matter I would so much rather open up my heart And lay down my guard Chorus: If I could trust someone To have my back and never do me wrong Then I would give my love up Just like that stop singing this soldier song (repeat) whomever said love was overrated must not be getting’ none my independent days have had their fun but when the parties over and the workin’ day is done I just want to come home to someone I want a love to take me As I am not make me compromise myself Or be like no one else Fear is not the matter I would so much rather open up my heart And just lay down my guard

foolish crushes, foolish smiles, foolish gestures.....

i've seen the future and it will be...

After my blog the other day, I received lots of love and even sadness which I didn't expect.  I really don't know what reaction I expected because I did it for me.  What I've realized is that honesty and transparency is scary for some. I'm not bothered about what you know about me. I'm bothered by what I don't know about myself.  Its all a spiritual thing.  Its a God thing. Its a Universe thing.  I listen. I respond. I'm obedient.  I do what I hear and I was told to purge via the blog, to release.  Sometimes the effects are unexpected and even negative but its about being obedient to my spirit. I greatly appreciate those who reached out to me with kind words and who were full of understanding. Thank you.  This is just the first days to a life of happiness and fulfillment but I have to wash away the muck. I'm seeking the freedom of my soul.  I meant every word and its liberating.  My journey is for my purpose and its all good. I underst...

This morning, I woke up thinking. I had mad thoughts racing through my mind about "Who is Rhonda?"  Its a question I continue to ask.  Fo r C ol or ed Gi rl s still fresh on my mind as I've examined my confusion of who I've become. I don't really know. I don't know who this person is that I carry around daily. I remember someone else, happier, more pleased with her smile, her style, her flow, her focus.  Today, I miss her. I wear an outer shell of this confusion, my body.  I can teach the world to eat, move, love and those steps are being lost on my own journey, my own poetry. This outer shell tells the story.  It tells the story of being kicked, smacked. It tells the story of being called dumb and told my dreams are foolish. It tells a story of longing for closeness from a father that doesn't know how to be close. It tells the story of repeated death and loss.  It tells the story of mistrust and dishonesty.   I'm wearing this outer shell of hurt an...

When reading Clevawords, please note, I don't claim to be a writer. I'm just one woman with an opinion, with emotion, with personal insight. enjoy.

After being very vocal about being Tyler Perry a less than favorite choice to direct an adaption of Ntozake Shange's "For Colored Girls who have considered suicide when the rainbow is enuf" or better known now as "For Colored Girls", I watched the movie feeling empty. I've seen myself in the colors of orange and green . I've empathized with the browns in my life. I know yellow and I know blue. Then there is RED . I could spend time examining the issues I had with the movie. I could also celebrate the power of dynamic words used to express OUR stories of various hues, depths, and struggles. The color red, Janet Jackson's character, disturbed me. This development of this character reeks of Perry's own personal agenda. He wanted to talk about the down low situation. He wanted to bring in HIV and so he did.  In spite of Janet's less than wonderful acting abilities, I was interested in how her story would play itself out. I heard about her. Th...

deep rooted manic insanity ensues grasping at doses of normalcy Walking through my past on the other side of it all lost drawn aching Yet feeling all things will come to peaceful resolve Looking to the heavens as a dove lays wait again on my windowsill seeing hope through the clouds seeing new things in the rain Knowing that the right answer will come from above Let my spirit be guided through the insanity Laying wait until it all comes to pass when the Divine answers the pending question embrace the truth pushing sadness aside no matter how much its taken over Hope is the light of all things Love covers all being the filthy rag I've become love and hope wins. Read more: http://www.myspace.com/clevacleva/blog?page=4#ixzz14Gx5sVlA

Would it be so arrogant to say that I am Perfection? that's not to say that I am perfect But I am as the Milky Way the sun, the moon, the shooting star I am the open sky the steaming rain, the tornado and the chilled winters day I am Perfection beautified, flowing and real smarts matched with seductive wiles libidinal energies touching your soul I know how to move you with simple words and parted lips I make you want me I am Perfection independently I stand for more than going green and the new social trends Motherhood singularly I stand still fighting for and believing in Fatherhood Fists and fros and nappy hair dark skinned blackness Revolution is in my soul I am purposed I am Perfection Read more: http://www.myspace.com/clevacleva/blog?page=2#ixzz14Gpz2VEy

Would it be so arrogant to say that I am Perfection? that's not to say that I am perfect But I am as the Milky Way the sun, the moon, the shooting star I am the open sky the steaming rain, the tornado and the chilled winters day I am Perfection beautified, flowing and real smarts matched with seductive wiles libidinal energies touching your soul I know how to move you with simple words and parted lips I make you want me I am Perfection independently I stand for more than going green and the new social trends Motherhood singularly I stand still fighting for and believing in Fatherhood Fists and fros and nappy hair dark skinned blackness Revolution is in my soul I am purposed I am Perfection Read more: http://www.myspace.com/clevacleva/blog?page=2#ixzz14Gpz2VEy

Wrestling with the emotions of streaming thoughts as the sea moans with displeasure of the winds the twisted mindset moves away from sweet words dripping from lying lips Walking towards light as I awaken from a slumber of loneliness confused by my solitude something embraced as needed but quiet moments reminders of emptiness Can I arise beautiful? Moving forth in perfection knowing my past is no more than a stepping stones to strength let me be no more confused sound Read more: http://www.myspace.com/clevacleva/blog?page=2#ixzz14GpGr2FT

Thinking about the sands of time you know Days of our Lives soap opera type of stuff on that drama type of thing daily watching the "stories" twists and turns lies and manipulations never being your fault but wait its just like sands through the hour glass One life to live madness funny the names the give these shows as empty as a broken promise again and again why do we lose our minds in nonsense The guiding light because it would take a soap opera for me to believe the bullshit again. Read more: http://www.myspace.com/clevacleva/blog#ixzz14GnoA6De

nice. hard to be nice. care. hard to care. be. hard to just be.

Never afraid to love its just the possibility of being loved back its where the fear sets in how will you love me open fists or a gentle kiss

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